Every time I tell people I’m moving to DC, I invariably get some version of the quote “If you want a friend in DC, get a dog.” My dad puts it in a slightly different way: “Nobody in the real world gives a shit about you.” Ha ha!
Well, it’s the 21st century, and as a child of the Internet, I lack the requisite social skills necessary to make friends or even function in sunlight. And forget about dogs — I’m allergic, and the lease on my new basement apartment forbids it. So I think we need to update President Truman’s quote: “If you want a friend in DC, get a blog.”
Seriously, it seems like everybody in DC blogs. And if they don’t blog, then they Twitter. And if they don’t blog or Twitter, then they’re living in an ivory tower. And that ivory tower probably doesn’t have internet access. Let’s just move on.
About me.
I’m a recent college graduate of a top 15 university, and like many of my peers, I don’t have a job. So I’m doing what any sensible person would do: I’m moving to DC, baby! Because that’s what you want to do when you have no income: live in one of the most expensive cities in the world (72nd, and 8th in the US, according to The Internet). Did I mention my dad’s a doctor?
I’m not there yet, but I’ll moving to the city in a few weeks. In the meantime, I’ve been preparing for DC life by waking up early, reading newspapers and online news content, and having extramarital affairs with congressional staff members. After that, I’m bracing myself for a few months of considerable financial hardship as I party every weekend and live off my parents’ income.
What you can expect in this blog.
This blog is all about me, and how every single event in the world is just a new and interesting way of explaining the historical importance of my life. It’s like the Truman Show, only if Truman was OK with the whole thing and then blogged about it every night.
What you can NOT expect in this blog.
Musings. Fuck musings.
OK, that’s it. I’m going for a hike in the Appalachians, I’ll see you when I see you.
9 responses so far ↓
Mr WordPress // June 14, 2009 at 4:56 pm |
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Bookie // June 28, 2009 at 11:50 am |
That you found it immediately necessary to drop that you recently graduated from a “top 15 university,” are living off your parents (doctor!), and claim that everyone (read: a slender cohort of your, ahem, elite, rich peers) in D.C. either blogs or twitters, despite your not living here yet, means that you’ll fit in nicely in the District.
Welcome.
scottahb // June 29, 2009 at 8:01 am |
Welcome to DC and the crowded job hunt. Look forward to reading more!
Patrick // June 29, 2009 at 8:39 am |
How did you figure out that everybody in DC blogs? You’ve certainly done your research when it comes to The District!
Julia // June 29, 2009 at 9:17 am |
You need to actually update your blog to make friends…haha. But welcome to DC…hope DC hasn’t hardened you too bad yet. While I don’t write my own blog I’ve attached my twitter, which is incredibly boring, so don’t read it. I do however read everyone’s blogs during the day at work, yay job security, good luck!
Malnurtured Snay // June 29, 2009 at 10:43 am |
Well, if you’re living off your dad, hopefully he’ll spring for drinks when you get out to a blogger happy hour
lacochran // June 29, 2009 at 12:00 pm |
“Seriously, it seems like everybody in DC blogs.”
Not everybody. Just people with musings.
“Fuck musings.”
Awkward.
Phil // June 29, 2009 at 12:48 pm |
Correction: if you want a friend in DC, get a blog, then agree to reciprocate posting links to their blogs.
You know where I stand.
Suburban Sweetheart // June 30, 2009 at 9:00 pm |
I second Bookie: Paragraph four tells me you’re DC material through & through. May I suggest Georgetown?